They weren’t “high-status males” with impressive jobs or flashy cars and fancy clothes.They didn’t have useful contacts for the social climbers or the money for those supposedly hypergamous women looking for the next level. who still managed to date sexy, intelligent, ambitious women. Being fun, being able to help someone enjoy themselves transcended looks and status.and it’s Being fun and helping others have fun is a way of keeping dates and potential relationship partners engaged and invested in the relationship.It’s a vital part of the chemistry that helps ensure that not only will she enjoy the first date but that she’ll be interested in coming back for a second… The worst dates date just drains the life out of everyone involved.Fun people are interesting – they tend to have diverse interests that they enjoy and have stories to share.This isn’t to say that it’s just a matter of telling a few jokes until you manage to laugh them into bed. Once I understood the appeal of fun, I began to recognize how it formed the underpinnings of everything I’d learned up to that point – and how much I had seen it in action over the years.
The problem is that they’re working on the wrong areas and a misunderstanding of just what makes somebody appealing to women. more often than not it’s not even in the top 5 of what makes a man attractive.It’s known as the Reward Theory of Attraction – we are attracted to people whose presence or behavior makes us feel appreciated and liked.When the feeling of pleasure at a person’s involvement in our lives outweighs the costs (someone who’s fun to hang around with but who causes problems through his behavior, for example) then we tend to be drawn towards that relationship over others.My friend Miles – he who attracts women the way cheese attracts mice – was successful not just because he looked like the bastard son of Hugh Grant and Rob Lowe but because he knew how to be fun.He was naturally outgoing and positive and instinctively understood how to make people feel good, how to feel guy who liked to tease and play around with everyone – especially the girls he was attracted to – and they would respond with great enthusiasm.More than looks, more than money, more than whatever nebulous definition you want to give to “value” or “status”, the most attractive aspect of a man, that x-factor that nets him attention, attraction and dates is… Over the years as I was trying to make my transition from “dateless loser” to “ladies man”, I got to know a wide variety of folks who were good with women.Some were blessed with every advantage – classic good looks, money and charm – while others had to work for their success.of time worrying about being more attractive to women.Men tend to feel as though they’re at a disadvantage when it comes to dating and consistently look for the magic bullet that will maximize their efforts.The brain increases dopamine and norepinephirine, which regulates the brain’s pleasure and reward centers.We associate the pleasure with the person and thus want to spend more time in their presence.