If you stay together, you’ll be Not My Father for years.Adding him to the mix creates a new layer of complexity—with no easy wins.In this culture, with its emphasis on thinness and junk food consumption, 23% of girls and 6% of boys have eating disorders.Parents have a lot more power than they realize in this area, but it needs to start early.The tween years are the critical time for kids to develop their own judgment and learn to draw on their own internal resources.Ten tips for practicing positive parenting at your house.And even more encouraging, experts say that most abuse cases, abductions, and even accidents involving children can be prevented if parents and children know what to do to avoid them.
Then use pickups and drop-offs as casual getting-to-know opps or to diffuse any drama.
The biggest danger for tweens is losing the connection to parents while struggling to find their place and connect in their peer world.
The biggest danger for parents is trying to parent through power instead of through relationship, thus eroding their bond and losing their influence on their child as she moves into the teen years.
So, when she says her ex has him for the night, consider it excellent news. The timeline on real-life offspring will likely be age-dependent: Babies have no idea you exist. Show kindness and a semblance of liking kids—but don’t go overboard or kiss her munchkin’s ass. Even with modern fertility science, all tadpoles come with some sort of father.
Note: This doesn’t mean sex will happen at her place. Talk to him as if he were your boss’s wife or a dental assistant. Chances are there will be four parties in this relationship: you, her, her kid—and the Birth Father.